MAINTAINING eye contact for longer than one Mississippi is hard to do.

I am average insecure about my outward appearance, average insecure about my opinions, about who I am to the outside world, so I get why making eye contact for longer than is comfortable (than "makes sense") is scary, exposing...unnatural. sometimes even dangerous if with the wrong person, in the wrong part of town.

BUT, I've been around people for 27 years, lived in major metropolitan cities, worked in companies with 500+ employees, i have had countless 1:1 in person meetings, you would think I would know how to look someone in the eye.

Or at least have found a way to deal. and get better. at gauging and not averting more than sustaining. sometimes I'll think back on a conversation I had with someone and not recall having made eye contact with them at all, or maybe once in the whole hour. that is. absurd. especially with someone you want to get closer to, or already are close to!

Clearly it is something with which I struggle.

Given all that, I was pleasantly surprised (and proud? energized?) when my colleague and I had many Mississippi's of sustained eye contact during a 1:1, in which we were meeting for the first time. Only broken when she said the the word fuck or 'shit like that,' and my eyes in line with the rest of my face naturally took a moment to laugh. We had a grand conversation, she has nice blue green eyes, and was kind and provided excellent advice.

That experience made me want to make more of an effort, and see what comes of it. (no pun intended). one of this week's goals.




Authorjustine lee